The photos in this post are graphic and may be disturbing for some viewers
On July 25th 2014, I was scheduled for my 4th neurosurgery to have my prosthesis put in! Since this was my fourth surgery related to my accident, I was more prepared for it and I knew exactly what to expect. And while there are always some nerves associated with surgery surprisingly for this one I was pretty calm.
My faith had guided me to choosing the prosthesis that was right for me. I believe that I made the right choice and because of that belief I know that it will be successful. I had prayed for guidance and when I had met with Dr. Spears to discuss the specifics of the Stryker implant and the surgery, my gut told me that I was in good hands and that this was the right option for me.
The practice of Mindfulness teaches you how to be aware of the present moment, but it also teaches you to be aware of the sensations in the body. It helps you to recognize and tune into your gut and what it is trying to tell you. With mindfulness, you learn to not be so focused on the future and what might happen that you forget to be in the moment. By the time of my prosthesis surgery, I had completed my first 8-week training in mindfulness and I felt like it had changed my life for the better.
I’ve always been a shy person. I also had a lot of anxiety after my accident which is why I started mindfulness in the first place. After starting this journey, I read something interesting in a book about mindfulness and anxiety. It said that being shy is a fear of the past and that anxiety is a fear of the future. While I don’t remember what book I read it in (sorry!!) this tidbit stood out for me and I have never forgotten it. It really resonated with me. I had never thought of shyness as being fearful but once I read this it made so much sense!!
For me, learning and practicing mindfulness has helped me with a lot of my fear. That’s not to say that I don’t still get scared because of course I do. Everybody gets scared sometimes. Now, my fear is more related to what is going on right then and there and it is not connected to the past or the future. At least not as much as it used to be.
My Prosthesis Surgery
My surgery was scheduled for early in the morning, so my parents and I made the trek down to St. Micheal’s hospital, via taxi with my overnight bag packed for the next few nights. When you go in for surgery, they always tell you that it can get bumped or canceled for an emergency, which is fine. It’s more important for them to deal with a crisis situation then me. Besides, I’ve waited this long I can wait a little while longer. This time there actually was an emergency so my surgery was delayed for a few hours.
The pre-operation stage is lengthy and there are a number of rooms you cycle through before moving into the OR. When I found out my surgery was being delayed I was in the second to last room. I had an amazing nurse who was taking care of me and she gave me some warm blankets and a little hose that you tuck into your sheets that pumps in warm air! It was wonderful! As I mentioned, my faith in God and my practice of mindfulness both contributed to me feeling relaxed and calm. I knew that the surgery was going to be successful and that I was going to be fine. I was so relaxed that, combined with the warm air and blankets, I was able to sleep while I waited for my surgery to be preformed!! So I was well-rested!! š
After my nap, I was moved to the final pre-op stage where you wait while the finish getting the room ready before the roll you in. While you wait there you see the anesthetist and they make sure that you are good to go. One of the nurses will come over and explain to you and your family what will happen and that after surgery I will be moved to the post-op recovery room before my parents can see me. While I would be in recovery, the surgeon would speak to my parents and let them know how it went.
I was then wheeled into the OR and they keep you awake for a few minutes while they get you moved onto the operating table and they start connecting you to everything. They also have you breathe in some oxygen to fill your lungs before putting you under. As this was going on, my prosthesis was brought in. It was still in it’s box and the box was HUGE!!! It was like the size of a desktop computer!! My prosthesis is only about the size of my hand so it must have been well padded!!
Dr. Spears came in while all this was going on, and briefly chatted with me, saying Hello and asking if I had seen the box, lol!! I was starting to wonder when the drugs were coming to knock me out!! Especially when I saw the razor come out – I definitely did not want to be awake when they shaved my incision line!! Luckily the drugs kicked in right about then and I was out cold.
My surgery was a success, the prosthesis was secured, but there was a slight complication. Since the bone had been out for so long, the skin on my scalp was tight so they had some trouble getting it to close. They ended up having to shave down my prosthesis a little and soak my scalp to get it to stretch so they could sew it closed. My scalp was very tight over the prosthesis for about a year afterwards but while the skin is still tighter on that side it is a lot looser now.
I stayed in the hospital for a few days before being discharged back to my parents house. Since I have had a team of doctors following and treating me, they all checked in on me in the days after the surgery. I also had a lot of follow up appointment booked at the hospital so that they could monitor me because of all the complications I have had with my incision line. I have to say, I really appreciated all of the care that the doctors showed me at St. Mike’s.
I will never forget my ride home from the hospital. When your bone flap is out, you feel every little bump in the road. I had lived that way for over a year and while it got easier being in a car, it would still bother my head when we would hit a bump. After this surgery, things were different. My taxi driver took us over a speed bump… and I felt nothing!! I mean, I felt the speed bump like everyone does, but I didn’t feel it in my head like I used to. I was so happy that I started to cry and then my mom started to cry too!! It’s the little things in life sometimes.
I know that this was a long post, so thank you for reading! Having my prosthesis surgery was a big milestone in my recovery but it’s not the end of my journey. Check back next week for another installment in my accident recovery.
Charlene xoxo