Beginning the Practice of Mindfulness

I ended off talking about how my prosthesis surgery had been delayed indefinitely and that my doctors had no idea how to heal it. It was during this time that one of my doctors suggested that I be referred to a plastic surgeon. We asked if someone from plastics could come up and look at it while I was there in the hospital to be sure that a referral there was appropriate. Waiting to see a specialist can take months and I didn’t want to wait to get in there only to have them tell me that they couldn’t help me. I was not leaving until I had been assessed by someone from that department. So I waited until the on-call plastic surgery doctor was available.

I don’t want to make it sound like I was being rude, because I wasn’t. I was determined. Which you often have to be to ensure that you get the care you are after. The on-call doctor, a resident, came up, took a look at my head, and treated it right there and then and gave me a follow-up appointment. This was the first, of many times that my wound was cauterized and treated with silver nitrate (Flamazine cream). When I went in for the follow up, I met Dr. Cross, a plastic surgeon, and (spoiler) one of my favourite people in the world.

Right after being cauterized

A few weeks later

When I left my appointment with Dr. Cross, she had assured me that she would help me to heal my wound. She asked me to trust her and to give her time but she was sure that it would heal. I left there feeling in my gut that I was in the right place. I had faith that I was on the right path and that with time, she would heal my wound.

In the meantime, while I was waiting I decide to move on with my life. I had no idea when (or if) these new treatments would work or when my next surgery would be. I discovered two things about myself during this time. 1. I hate waiting and 2. I hate not being in control. My social worker recommended that I read Pema Chodron’s Comfortable with Uncertainty. I did, and it really resonated with me. I also appreciated some of the Buddhist teachings and perspectives that were starting to be discussed in my sessions. It was around this time that the subject of Mindfulness first entered my consciousness.

The Practice of Mindfulness

Mindfulness is all about bringing a conscious awareness to the present moment. It teaches you how to offer care and loving attention to yourself and your life. Mindfulness also teaches you ways to respond more effectively to the challenges and demands of your life. Sign me up!! Anything that might help me with the stress, anxiety and uncertainty that I was facing I was ready to try.

I started participating in individual Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) sessions. The sessions were conducted in my parents home since I was still living with them and we met every Monday for 8 weeks. The program had to be modified to my needs because I still had part of my skull out, so there were certain things like lying down meditations and longer walking meditations or yoga that I was not able to do.

Despite all of this, starting mindfulness was the best thing that I have done for myself. It has really changed my life. Mindfulness is definitely something that you need to practice everyday but even after 8 weeks you can see the benefits to your life. I only wish that I had known about mindfulness sooner.

I responded so well to mindfulness that I was inspired to become certified as a teacher of MBSR. It is something that I am truly passionate about. I am currently on the training pathway having just completed the first part of the prerequisites for the program while I was in California. I am excited to continue on this journey and I will share more about it here with you.

Charlene xoxo